[A heartbeat]

12/05/07 - :

Nice week. Played some kind of modified handball game with most of the guys and charmaine for the first half of PE while waiting for the rest of them doing napfa to join us. Haha. It was funny. They used all sorts of methods to play the game, we couldn't really find a name for it. Soccer fanatics like colin and yx must always do some tricky stunts with their legs before aiming the ball towards the goalpost, while basketball ones like weiting would do his aiya basketball way of tossing. Haha. Anyway, so mean of them la. All of them went like "Wahh.." when ms tang said i got gold for napfa. Like they couldn't believe it or something. Heh. I'm fit okay! Haha. Oh the girls were even funnier when they came later. You can hear them screaming everytime the ball flew towards them. Zhuan called it the distraction strategy. Haha. Nice one. Oh yea. We found some smashed bits of red stuff spluttered all over the windows on the 5th floor. Then for each day of the whole week, weiting, colin, yx and I have been checking on it. Haha. Each one of us's been giving a 'critical analysis' of it. Haha. It's still there and yes, we're still trying ta figure out if it was a bird that got cruelly spliced by the generator of just a tomato fruit that's been squished and then used to disguise a massacre. Dunno. Haha. Colin sent me a pic on it. But oh wells. We'll know when the worms start coming. Whatever it is, their theories are so funny. You should hear them.

Oh wells. All would have been fine except that some of us got scolded. Like again. Okay, it wasn't really a scolding. James said he's not really affected by it and laughed when I got so agitated by it. So here's how it went. Vanessa, James, Jiesi and I were taking the lift to bio lab. Some bald-headed teacher(I don't mean to be so mean and explicit, but this guy, arrgs! If he could keep his comments to himself, I promise I'd keep mine too!) came in with another lady teacher. Her hands were full(and so were mine, pls). I hadn't read my SPA package yet, but somehow I managed to take mine back from james. But this man huh, had to say to james and th rest of us, "You should be passing your things to her (ME) and helping this teacher carry hers instead. " And before he left, "Aiyah, you youngsters ah, are terrible you know!" (Fortunately the lady teacher was uber nice. She said it was alright she could manage and she was getting out on the 2nd floor.) Okay the point is. In a way he was right, we could have offered to help (so could he actually, mister!), but it's the last sentence her said that really irked me. So much for acting all nice and helpful, the big question is, why couldn't he himself have offered to help if he really meant it? And since he didn't, isn't he as terrible as he called us?! Especially when those words were unnecessary. Is this what you call pointing a finger at others and having the other four at yourself? I once saw him pushing one of my friends pretty hardly aside because he accidentally crossed this man's walking pathway. So really, if he had that gentlemanly streak in him at all.

I think after reflecting quite a bit on my own emotions and events like this, I realise how much I hate to be criticised unfairly. If I deserve to be scolded, fine. Like if i didn't do my work or something, i would accept being sent for detention even though i don't like it. The thing is that i would accept it without retaliation. And even form the right attitude meant to be achieved throught this form of discipline - embarassment, if not better, shame. But this inccident. If i don't deserve it, i won't tolerate it especially if it's a comment made by a senior. Cos they always think they're older and more respectable and therefore am qualified to give more of their opinions. Like hello, no one is superior to others because of age alright. If you don't deserve my respect, that's it, you won't get it. And in any case, if i make an effort to listen to you even though you may be wrong, it will be because, for one, i respect you and the other, i know you did it out of love for me. Mom says i shouldn't take things so personally and not like let a situation like this affect me because there may be many more to come. That's true. Got branded as irresponsible for not checking the paper filler for enough paper before printing my documents. Wow. Like is there a problem if i fill it up with paper later when it's empty later? For goodness sake, it won't even spoil the printer. I think we all need some common sense education once in a while.

Whew! This is like a dump for my rages. Well at least once I've vomit it all out, it won't affect me again. Me? I need anger management i think. Haha. Grr..

_.a heart beat._ 20:42

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